Just read an interesting and timely article on getting past 'No' answers from Kids...Hope it will be really really helpful for the parents who have demanding kids..(simply...must read for all parents :))
Offer limited choices
We like the idea of giving choices within boundaries. For example, with our 22 month old, Noah, if he says he is hungry, I might say "Okay, lets have a piece of fruit. Would you like a banana or grapes?" That way he is making the choice, and the choice is a healthy one. — Adrienne
I have a 2-year-old son, and "No" with a high-pitched whine is his favorite way of answering any question. Then I try to change the situation for both of us. If the problem is taking a bath, I tell him he has a choice: He can either take his bath and play with his toys, or go to bed. He chooses the bath every time. I think the answer is to give him choices that I can live with, but choices nonetheless. — Susanne, Colorado
Respond with humor
My 2 1/2-year-old won't always cooperate — no surprise! For instance, I'll ask him to sit down to eat and he'll say "No!" and laugh, and start dancing around instead. That used to make me mad (okay, it still does), but I try to laugh back and say something like, "What's going on there, Legs? You tell Bottom to sit right in that chair!" That makes him laugh and breaks his defiant mood. — Jan, Minnesota
I'll ask my 19-month-old to pick up his shoes or his dirty clothes and sometimes he says no. Instead of pushing it I start singing Clean Up Song and he hops to it. I try to sing and dance around and show him what I want him to do and he does it. Of course, my husband thinks I'm a little nuts, but I've caught him doing it a time or two also. — Anonymous
One of our strategies with our 2-year-old son is to give him more attention when he starts saying "no" to everything, and make it funny. We ask him a string of questions, each more ridiculous than the last, to which he can answer "no." "Do you want broccoli with mustard?" "No!" "Do you want peanut butter and pickles?" "No!" Eventually he is laughing, and we just move on and do whatever it was he said no to while his guard is still down. — Diane, California
Turn tasks into games
I try to deal with stubbornness by making the task seem more fun. Going potty before leaving the house can be an endless battle in our home, so now we "fly" our 2 1/2-year-old son to the bathroom. By the time we get there, he is laughing and having so much fun he is willing to go potty. — Lisa, Washington
It was always a struggle to get my toddler to brush her teeth. Three things finally worked for us, introduced in this order: 1) Raffi's song "You brush your teeth" on Singable Songs for the Very Young, which we've played several times a day because it's on an album Shaela loves; 2) watching us brush, without asking her to do it or letting her do it herself — magical combination of adult modeling and forbidden fruit, I guess; and 3) a baby toothpaste called Baby's First that tastes good and is okay for her to swallow. — Mita, Ontario, Canada
My 2-year-old would never cooperate at toothbrushing time. "No!" she'd yell, and clamp her mouth closed, even when given her Teletubby toothbrush and tasty kid-style toothpaste. Now I don't tell her to brush her teeth but to roar like a lion, as loud as she can. She loves doing this and doesn't mind that I slip the toothbrush in and give her a good brushing while she roars. — Mary, Illinois
Use reverse psychology
When I have heard one "no" too many from my 2 1/2-year-old son, reverse psychology always seems to work. I just say, "Oh, okay then, I'll do it by myself." He always chimes right in with that fierce independence and says, "No, I will do it by my big self!" And he does. — Barbre, New Jersey
When my toddler doesn't want to take time away from her busy schedule to go potty, I say, "Don't you go potty!" Then when she does, I say, "Oh, you went potty!" and tickle her and make it a game. — Monica, Nebraska
Get his full attention
A recent visit with our associate pastor gave us a new strategy. When asking Matthew, age 3, to do something (get dressed, pick up his toys), we place our hands on each of his arms and look right into his eyes before asking him to do the task at hand. He knows that we mean business! It really gets his attention and cooperation. — Dale and Julie
Take turns
Our daughter Dayna is 2 years old and wants to do everything herself. When I ask her to do something, like get out of her car seat after I've unbuckled her, I give her some time to do it herself (a few seconds). Then if she's not moving quickly enough, I tell her it's now her turn, but if she doesn't do it, then it'll be my turn. If she still doesn't move, I begin counting to 10 — then she knows how much time she has. Sometimes I make it fun by speeding up the count toward the end, or telling her that the last time she did it in eight seconds, to encourage her to beat her previous record. If she still hasn't completed her task, then I tell her it's my turn and I move toward her. Usually that's all it takes. — Carey, Arizona
Don't bother to fight it
My daughter Madison, recently 2, has fallen right into the "no" habit, and she's very good at it. When she says no to changing her diaper or eating or getting dressed, whatever it may be, I simply say, "Okay, then, Mommy will go wash the dishes," and I leave the room. It doesn't take more than five seconds for her to start calling me back, and then she's ready for whatever it is we need to do. — Anonymous
Take advantage of "Me do it!"
My daughter is 26 months old. She always used to be eager to help us do things, and would happily respond when we said, "Mommy / Daddy wants to (do whatever it is), so you can you please help?" So now when she's feeling independent and wants to say no to everything, we say instead, "Show Mommy / Daddy that Sher Lene can do (whatever it is) all by herself." That works! — Maggie, Malaysia
Help them learn through teaching
My 3-year-old eggs his little brother on in doing things he knows they shouldn't, and he won't cooperate when we tell him to stop. So now when they do something like start climbing on the kitchen table or jumping on our bed, we'll say to him, "Can you show your little brother where we can climb?" or "Ben, I need you to teach Alex the rules about jumping on the furniture." Then he's proud to be the big boy who knows the rules. — Katie, California
Try alternate phrasing
I have a very busy 3-year-old son, Dustin. When he says "No!" to me, I try to reword what I said in a way that makes it sound better to him, so he'll say yes. Example: "Dustin, it's time to pick up your toys." "No!" "Okay, Dustin, do you want to vacuum?" (He loves to vacuum.) "Yeah." "Then you need to pick up your toys so you can vacuum." — Lisa, Nevada"
